The Mind is a (Beautifully) Tricky Thing

A new year and new decade present an interesting opportunity to start anew. And oftentimes, that comes in the form of habits and goals. You must decide not to just chase something you’ve always dreamed of but to strategically pursue it… with a plan of action, a community of support and a strong dose of confidence. 

Part of that planning process is a focus on mindset and understanding how you must think in order to contribute to how you want to feel. But rarely does it feel easy to do.

Confidence is an interesting thing. It comes so easy to some and remains elusive to others. Despite initial or even continued success, confidence might not follow. So many working moms question if success is really possible with all the responsibility they are shouldered with. Then, for those who do start to gain some success, they often start to question whether or not they earned it. While imposter syndrome is a very real thing for many women, it is possible to succeed and to gain confidence along the way.

3 Keys to Successfully Conquering Imposter Syndrome in Your Business

According to PsychologyToday.com, imposter syndrome is “a psychological term referring to a pattern of behavior where people doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent, often internalized fear of being exposed as a fraud.”

When you lack belief in yourself and your abilities, you constantly worry that others will discover what you believe to be true. This means that even when outcomes counter your own beliefs about yourself, you continue to doubt yourself. (Sound familiar?)

Some women and mamas are incredibly confident in one area of life like work or motherhood, and lacking in another, say physical fitness. For another, it might be the opposite – she excels in the gym but constantly doubts her ability to parent her child.

We all have areas of our life where we want or even need to improve. An area that we need to work on but lack the confidence and motivation to make it a priority.

The only way to improve, your business or yourself, is to set a goal and work towards it incrementally. So, to help you have a more confident year, I want to share my best tips for tackling imposter syndrome while gaining confidence along the way. 

Key #1: Put Your Goals on Paper

There is so much science about the power of documenting your goals, journaling and a gratitude practice. For those battling imposter syndrome, journaling allows time for reflection… to look back on what you have accomplished and take it in. From there, you can determine what comes next.

When you lack confidence in your ability, despite experiencing success, taking time to note your successes and process them allows you to more fully take in what you’ve accomplished. That is the first step to knowing you CAN do it… that you are doing it.

So what does this look like? I like to keep a notebook with me where I can make notes about things I want to remember and reflect on. I also use a notes app on my phone to write down five things I’m grateful for each day. The key here is that they don’t have to be monumental things; little moments are fine! 

Being thankful for the small things is just as beneficial and likely easier to think of. Some days I’m thankful for a good cup of coffee or a little extra sleep in the morning. I’ve even noted being thankful that I got so much laundry done that day. #momlife And let’s be honest, life is made up of a lot more little moments than, monumental moments. 

Key #2: Start With a Quick Win to Gain Confidence

When looking to boost your confidence, one of the easiest ways to do that is to go after the quick win. We all have things we are good at and know we do well. Getting the quick win allows us to feel a sense of accomplishment and motivates us to continue working hard, especially when we doubt our own abilities.

One could argue that momentum is often a key factor in success. Momentum gets the ball rolling and creates energy and excitement about what is to come. When you’ve experienced success, no matter how large or small, it’s hard to not feel a bit of excitement about what comes next. So many things in life are about momentum and quick wins get the ball rolling. Momentum helps us focus on the work that needs to be done and the path we set forth to reach our goals. 

So what does this look like? Quick wins vary across organizations, projects, and priorities, but are those things that can be completed quickly and well. These activities generate an immediate return that supports what comes next, as well as providing an opportunity to experience success. The important thing to remember is that this is as simple as checking something off the to-do list. If your to-do list is overwhelming you, prioritize those things you can get done quickly, allowing you to make progress towards your goals and gain a sense of accomplishment.

Key #3: Keep Energy Moving

This last piece of advice builds on the previous suggestions and might seem a bit odd, but stay with me. So much of our success is based on both our mindset and our ability to just do the work. That being said, you wouldn’t get up and run five miles one day on a whim. One of the most underrated keys to success is preparation. For me, that means activity. I make a point of getting myself fired up before something big (or little).

So what does this look like? Before a call, whether with my team, a client or prospect, I do jumping jacks to get the blood flowing. This raises my energy level which is something that translates through the phone line. I’m also a fan standing or walking around while on the phone. This keeps me energized, which comes through in my confidence. When I’m active, I feel more capable which is exactly how I want to feel and how I want others to perceive me. 

While there is no key to success that works in every situation for everybody, there is no denying the importance of confidence to continued success. There is no magic formula to gain confidence overnight. Instead, it’s about setting an intention in all that you do. How do you prepare for those big things that are happening in your life? How do you pause and reflect on the successes you have, no matter how large or small? How do you make moments count?

Deflection is something we are all guilty of. It’s important that when good things happen, we take time to accept and appreciate what we are capable of, before moving on to what’s next. Because there is always more to do.

From one driven mama to another, you’ve got this.